I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize