Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

(818): View more from California

Just made out with a pet sitter. His biz card says "even hamsters". Lowest point in my life.

Fav 10 915 1508
share tweet
(812): View more from Indiana

Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.

Fav 4 852 1716
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(613): View more from Ontario

Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.

Fav 10 4769 1032
share tweet
(519): View more from Ontario

her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs

Fav 20 11976 1779
share tweet
27 Parents Confess Shocking Secrets Their Kids Don’t Know
Read it at the TFLN blog
(310): View more from California

So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?

Fav 15 5495 1370
share tweet
(919): View more from North Carolina

so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?

Fav 40 1980 6083
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(360): View more from Washington

It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.

Fav 5 2466 924
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(623): View more from Arizona

Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.

Fav 2 1022 638
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(631): View more from New York

My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls

Fav 1 20 33
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT