I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
