How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize