you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Randomize