Don't you send me to vm
I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
