So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Randomize
