Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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