do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
Randomize
