like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
Randomize
