The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Randomize
