I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
Randomize
