either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
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Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
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What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.