Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
She's the barista slut.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Randomize
