Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
Randomize
