apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
she pinky promised me she was 18
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
Randomize
