Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
Randomize
