it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
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