He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
I understand Curling. That high.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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