Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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