Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (212): View more from New York

  It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (212): It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you. http://tfl.nu/rmlk
  Replies (23) Good night (639) Bad night (1622)
• Favorite

  (575): View more from New Mexico

  This is awkward. You have a four minute voicemail from me. I would delete it. I accidently hit your number on speed dial and called you while I was vomiting a mai tai.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (575): This is awkward. You have a four minute voicemail from me. I would delete it. I accidently hit your number on speed dial and called you while I was vomiting a mai tai. http://tfl.nu/0dst
  Replies (3) Good night (823) Bad night (3217)
• Favorite

  (718): View more from New York

  you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (718): you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass" http://tfl.nu/foy3
  Replies (22) Good night (1180) Bad night (4654)
• Favorite

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (615): i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time. http://tfl.nu/0k6p
  Replies (12) Good night (3815) Bad night (678)
• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  how was your day?

  (404): View more from Georgia

  fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (850): how was your day? (404): fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i? http://tfl.nu/0urf
  Replies (21) Good night (9394) Bad night (996)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.

  (1-610): View more from Pennsylvania

  who'd you have sex with.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (610): terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions. (1-610): who'd you have sex with. http://tfl.nu/97tl
  Replies (12) Good night (2375) Bad night (4327)
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (585): My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon. http://tfl.nu/q628
  Replies (8) Good night (3743) Bad night (1020)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (518): I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave. http://tfl.nu/ne75
  Replies (2) Good night (690) Bad night (959)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (832): I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock http://tfl.nu/sqvr
  Replies (2) Good night (947) Bad night (463)
• Favorite

  (905): View more from Ontario

  All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (905): All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for. http://tfl.nu/6yyp
  Replies (12) Good night (818) Bad night (2300)
• Favorite

  (937): View more from Ohio

  Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (937): Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron http://tfl.nu/gvqp
  Replies (1) Good night (688) Bad night (456)
• Favorite

  (210): View more from Texas

  Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (210): Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often. http://tfl.nu/cowe
  Replies (14) Good night (1008) Bad night (467)
• Favorite

  (515): View more from Iowa

  Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (515): Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use. http://tfl.nu/510e
  Replies (2) Good night (734) Bad night (366)
• Favorite

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (401): apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high http://tfl.nu/w0gd
  Replies (3) Good night (857) Bad night (413)
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (773): I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober http://tfl.nu/r8u7
  Replies (2) Good night (477) Bad night (318)

Randomize