Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(440): View more from Ohio

My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.

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(757): View more from Virginia

6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand

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(843): View more from South Carolina

i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(870): View more from Arkansas

So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button

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(860): View more from Connecticut

I smell like Captain Morgan and tears

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(417): View more from Missouri

Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times

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(661): View more from California

Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.

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(631): View more from New York

They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.

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