More tranny stories later!
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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