I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
Randomize
