Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
