I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
Only a mothe r could love this liver
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
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