So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
