Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
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