i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
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