Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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