Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
