if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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