all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
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