She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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