She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Randomize
