Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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