Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Randomize
