My kitchen smells like failed pina coladas.
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize