I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
