My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
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