How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Randomize
