Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Randomize
