I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
19 Unhappily Married People Confess The Red Flags They Ignored
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
These 23 People Destroyed Their Entire Lives In An Instant
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.