hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
