You're so nebulous sometimes
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
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