I can tuck mytits in my pants
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
Randomize
