Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
that is very illegal...i love you.
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