My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
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