Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
I will be naked everywhere
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
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