what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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